Where Does Influence Come From with Dr. Izdihar Jamil

Dr. Izdihar Jamil, Ph.D.—#1 International Bestselling Author of Money Makers and a Media Expert—has appeared on FORBES, FOX TV, and TED discussing her mission to share women’s voices WITHOUT prejudice. She helps women be the #1 Authority in their field with proven and effective methods. She lives in California with her husband and children, she loves baking and reading.

Learn more about Izdihar:

• Izdihar’s Website
• Izdihar’s Instagram

Episode resources:

• Create Purpose Website 

• Join Zach’s Mastermind
• Book: Unstoppable by Tim S. Grover
• Book: Can’t Hurt Me by David Goggins

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Transcript:

Izdihar Jamil: So if you just trust the process and just share, just like Nahdra, just like Claire. I want a cat. I want a pony. Just like put it out there and let the experts or the professionals take care of it. Cause that's the reason why you hire us in the first place. Right? You just do this one thing darling and I’ll take care of the rest.

Zach Arend: All right. I want to take a moment to make an announcement. I want to let you know that I'm taking applications right now for the create purpose Mastermind, an intimate Mastermind group for aspiring seven figure creative female business owners who are looking to build their dream team. So if that's you go to createpurpose.net/mastermind.

Here's what it's going to look like. If you decide to spend a year with me and this intimate Mastermind, you know, when I was putting us together, I really was thinking about what are the outcomes that I want you to get as a result of spending a year in this group. Number one is I want you to discover your unique greatness, because when you surround yourself with people who see you for who you are, And are able to draw you back to your own greatness so much can change.

Number two, I want to help you master your inner game because everything in business starts with self-awareness of why things are the way they are. Because as soon as you become aware of that, you get to decide and make a choice to change it for the better. Number three, I want to see you lead with confidence.

You know, because I fundamentally believe you already have everything you need. You don't need another guru to show you the way, and I want to see build your dream team. And that's what we're ultimately going to be doing in this group is building a business around a team of people that no longer centers around you, the leader, but you now have a team where you now are able to free yourself up to be the true CEO and create a visionary of your business.

Ultimately. To grow your business, make your business easier to manage more profitable and a lot more fun. So if you're an inspiring seven figure creative female business owner, who's wanting to build your dream team and grow your business. Then please don't wait. There's only 12 seats available. So don't hesitate in getting your application in.

What if this were to be your breakthrough? And what if this Mastermind is exactly what you need to really grow your business and bring your unique potential to life, to learn more, go to createpurpose.net/mastermind. 

Welcome back to the Create Purpose Podcast. And today I get to sit down with Dr. Izzy Jamil. She's a number one international bestselling author and media expert. She's appeared on Forbes, Fox, TV, and Ted discussing her mission to share women's voices without. Today she helps women be the number one authority in their field using proven and effective methods to doing so in today's conversation with Dr.

Izzy. We talk about courage and what it really means to take courage and how everything in and around us starts to change when we lean in to what scares us. And that's actually where our authority and influence comes from. So without further ado, let's get into today's episode with Dr. Izzy. Right here we are.

Is he. Before we start today's episode, I would love to ask you to set an intention for our time. And the reason I know to ask you to do that, that's something you did. I was on your podcast recently and it's something we did behind the scenes and I loved it. I loved it. And I think maybe we can debrief and talk a little bit about it afterwards, but let's just start with you setting an intention.

If you don't mind, I would love that.

Izdihar Jamil: absolutely. So I usually start off with taking a couple of deep breaths because sometimes in the chest sizes, I just take a couple of deep breaths and then the big Buddha belly

into it. And then I. Crown myself, calm myself and kind of like listen to, to my heart, to my God, to the one within me, the soul within may our hearts be opened, my husband connect it now with conversation, be fit with love, joy laughter. Maybe we find the courage to say our tooth to be authentic and to say what really matters and most beneficial to others.

But we always be. To get goodness to make goodness and to help others to see the light, even though it is hard. And so it is, and so it is done

Zach Arend: Very good.

Izdihar Jamil: and that's the intention.

Zach Arend: I love that. Let's just start there for a moment. And then I want to, I, you have a powerful story. You spoke on Ted stages. Other stages been on Fox, been featured in Forbes. I want to, I want to hear more of your story, but since we just set an intention, let's debrief that a little bit, because that is such a powerful exercise and it took not even a minute. How do you use that, that intention.

setting an intention? Is that something you start podcast episodes, but where else in your life you do create that pause to set an intention? How do you use that as a practice for yourself?

Izdihar Jamil: It's always like, kind of set an intention, but I was always like, said it in my heart. I wouldn't verbalize it. I wouldn't vocalize it and surprising me. It was on my Ted talk because before my Ted talk, the organizer hat trainings that was given to us and the trainer was the one who taught me, like, you know what, it's okay to burn this.

And she was the one who's kind of. Showed me, you know, actually it's okay to verbalize. And she set the intention for the group, because if you can imagine, like Ted speakers, like we haven't met each other, we have different stories. So the energy was like pretty unsettled. But then when we did that, everything just even in our conversation today, Zach, you had your dog to have to give her a bath and I'm like, my laptop isn't working.

It's like, And then if you can feel that when we set the intention or everything, just settle. It's what really matters is the conversation between you and me today, the connection of our hearts, the ability to share our love, our joy, our truth, and courage to other people and push their hearts. That is what we map in this conversation.

It just sets the tone on me connecting to what is it that I'm playing. Um, for others to feel, to feel it. I really do believe that people can feel it and feel our energy, especially when we're in front of people. Right. We're responsible on how our thinking, our thoughts, our what's going on within mass people tend to pick things up that it's just trying to sense that this coldness is peacefulness, but also Strang and clarity.

Hopefully it will be included in this conversation.

Zach Arend: Yeah, well, in, in our episode, so I was on your podcast. I'll I'll make sure I put a link in the show notes. So. And your podcast,

Izdihar Jamil: Thank you.

Zach Arend: but we talked about leadership coming from within, you.

know, I work with a lot of entrepreneurial leaders, makers, creatives, artists, right. I call right brain business owners, just creative individuals, very inspiring individuals. this idea of leadership really come from an intense. You, if you can intend towards the leader that you desire to be, and you can choose to show up that way. And it all starts with you centering yourself thinking about who do you want to be in this moment? What type of intentions do you want to set?

What type of obstacles might you anticipate and how do you want to respond to those obstacles as your best self? You know, those are the intentions because when you set those intentions, You put yourself at, at the, the cause of what happens next. You're not at the effect. You're powerful. And you're putting yourself in a position to have influence and impact with those around you because you're choosing that in yourself and that you, and how you did that, just I'm like.

I want to, I want to call you sometimes like, Hey, I'm about ready to speak or I'm about ready to have this coach and says, can we do that? Because it's so inspiring. And so let's, let's get into today. Would it be cool with you? If I'd love to hear your story a little bit, it's a powerful, powerful story. And we've gotten to know each other over the last year, we're in a mastermind together and I've gotten to know you and we've become friends.

Izdihar Jamil: Okay.

Zach Arend: We've had some fun times and you've gotten mad at me and you know, it is like, like best friends do. Right. And so I would love everyone to hear your story. Like, I've gotten to hear your story because it's moved me and I know it'll move those that are listening. So where, where does this story begin? Where would you want to start?

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah. I mean like, oh, stop. Where the moment my husband, without he says to me, I got my dream. Do you want to move to America? I don't know. Let's do it. The house is being job. I've been working on for years. Right. I had young kids. I'm like, okay, let's do it. So I literally. So the care to my son Abrao was for my daughter.

Nado was still a BB fan rezone myself. So we moved from Indonesia and then all the way to orange county. So I left my job. I was working as a computer scientist as academician at one university status. I'm like, okay, where are you going? So we moved to orange county and as we're settling in, I go to whole foods to get some.

It's the month of, from a bond. So one of the things that we do in breaking our fast, so we fast in the month of Ramadan is eight. So I go to whole foods and then as I'm, you know, getting the dates, I see like a middle age, white guy, a little bit taller than me. I'm about five, four. So he's maybe 5, 7, 5 minute.

So you say it's to me, are you Muslim? And I said, yes, I am. Well, I have threatened the court on any space that killing and the name of Islam is permissible. Are you going to bill your yourself up? And I'm thinking, dude,

but I'm Sam doing my groceries. I've got young kids. I'm not going to blow myself up. Then he says, if you're not a mom, are you going to know yourself? And I can just feel

my chest. I couldn't breathe. And then a few weeks after my baby not address, she's having the worst tantrum. And as soon as my husband,

I'm taking a shower, I'm there. I add on washing my face. When I hear bang, bang. Come down now, my husband says best police officers waiting for you. So I'm like talk myself off, put on my heat job, pick up, non-drug go down and stuff. And I see two police officers in full gear, guns of official DORS, and then fingers on the trigger.

And the officer says, man, what is your baby crying? Because she's the baby. And then he checks her out my dress. I see the Lauder, but it's nothing wrong with her. So they leave and then it just made me to even go out of my home. I couldn't go out of my hope that scariness of something something's going to happen.

And that mom and my husband was like, this is to me one day.

I know online course though, you can be an online coach and it can stop. And now he just wants it to cheer me up. Cause I'm like so down and I'm like, okay. So I check it out. I think at one of the things I had to do business coming from being a victim, right? I'm like, oh, what's this happening? It was sad. I was angry.

So my husband got me something that I use to shoot my mind. To focus on something positive. So one of the things I have to do is go live on social media. I remember mother's day 2018 pink top floor job, some makeup on, and then I turned on the camera and then just people I want to hit the live button for the first time.

Just people that I feel, people are going to think. And then I think, God, let me be brave. Turn on the camera, please. Again, please. For 30 minutes to find me,

then I just tried and then I do it again the next day and the next and the next. And it isn't easy, but I persisted. And today I'm a multiple number one international best selling author I've been featured on folks' cat, Phoebe magazines, hundreds of leads. Now I believe no person should ever have to be afraid of who you are.

And unique voices should be heard on prestigious platforms around the world without prejudice.

Zach Arend: Wow. And So that brings us to today. I mean, what now that you've gone, what is it that you do for your clients?

Izdihar Jamil: So what I do, I'm a me publicity expert. I hope to get their polices, that business, that story across multiple paths. So, whether it's being a best-selling author, whether it's getting on TV, whether it's getting on magazines, full tad. So all the works that that voices can be seen, that's where I can take them, because I feel that the more that people are able to listen to, the more they're able to be seen and heard chances are that.

More people are going to know about them, know like love and trust them. And more importantly, they get to make a difference. They get to live that purpose and obviously grow that business when clients and all that. But I think like uni, when we go into here, it's about helping others, solving problems, taking care of other people.

So that's what I've believed in across multiple prestigious paths.

Zach Arend: Yes. And he know if we were to spend some time talking about that because I share with you a little bit, the listeners, a lot of them own businesses, maybe they're a product-based business, they're makers, jewelry, or art, or. The their coach or they're, they're just, they're they're impact driven for sure.

You know, I often hear my clients tell me, like, I don't want to grow just to grow. I don't want to just be profitable to be profitable. Their businesses mean something to them and that they, they also have something. That they are role modeling, whether they use that language or not, they know that people are looking up to them.

And so they're very mindful of the messages that they're bringing in and they have a message and a lot of them are on Instagram. They're there, they're really out front. And so if we were to explore a little bit of, you know, you and your website, you talk about how you help people go from zero to top authority.

And, and in a short amount of time too, I mean, I've, I've watched your trajectory and, and you, you know, how you got on Ted stages and doing all the things and sharing your message. If there's somebody listening who feels like they have a message that they want to share from a bigger stage and, and have a larger platform, what advice would you have for them, or what would be some of the steps that you would guide them through to find that for themselves.

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah. So one of the things that. And look at is where do you want to be feet, first of all. Cause there's multiple platforms, right? Where do you want to be seen and what kind of impact that you to be getting. Also the light. What kind of experiences that you have, for example, getting on test stage, if you haven't been speaking or comfortable being on stage that we maybe want to train you a little bit more.

So, like, I usually start off with something simple, something easy to build up their confidence because you can imagine. It is scabies that it's okay to put your stuff out. That is scary to share your story because people gonna judge you, people are gonna give comments about too. So we usually start off with something simple.

For example, it gets them on a magazine. Like a small article on a magazine, on them with a picture or we get them on a couple of interviews or a couple of pages, depending on what, what, the one thing with our online books, when they're ready, we get them into books and then TV shows, you know, we train them step by step one thing at a time and then build it up, build it up, build it up.

For example, for. A lot of the ladies that I know I want to be on. I want to be on the books the same with me. I want to be unfold. But then literally when the opportunity comes to me that

guess what I said, no,

I don't think I'm ready. I'm too busy. And this and that, but it's something that I have been praying for. For months and for years, but then when it comes, I'm like, I just like to say, no, we did the contrived fiction. It just shows that, you know, because I was scared at that time. And then when a lady says to me, what are you talking about?

I I'm the prize and it kind of lets shift my mindset, even though I've already done a lot of the work to build my credential, to fill my experience on you want to forward. They do not want you to be because of their audience. So it's kind of like getting them ready and get into places. Then mindset, build that confidence of spread out the message across multiple platforms, writing digital's speaking, and then build it up to where they want to go.

And pat them kind of like insulate them a little bit sometimes. People kind of say this and this and this about too, and that's okay. It's going to happen, but you get yourself and focus for what? Like for example, they had to date. I just helped my son Abrar who's 11 to become a bestselling author. So I was posting that.

I was excited, said he got his dream. He way, you know, he wanted to use that money to buy a computer. And then all of a sudden I got a messy proof read your posts cause we need that. They're working so hard day and night instead, it'd be just like proof that your post is status. That I'm like, come on. Like it's kind of like full of from your feet, but then I'm like, but that's what it's about when you're being in front of me.

Zach Arend: Yeah. I'm curious what you think about this idea of authority, you know, influencer authority, thought leader, you know, all those terms out there. What do you think about the statement authority comes from with. And I'm wondering if, if, if that resonates with you and if you could speak to that, if that does, you know, what's your experience been with?

Like, where does authority come from? comes from.

Izdihar Jamil: Absolutely. And I knew spot on on that because my love, my fault stole me. Right. I didn't have it within me to cook into myself on the authority. So it always starts from within in the sense. The courage that you want to pull out of you, right? The story that you've gotta to be trusting, that's coming out of you, be messages that it'd be stating who you are within you, how you look, how you feel your height and everything around you.

If you haven't got that, look forward to it, or a sense of set on us or a sense of, I own. I owned everything around me. I own this. And hold on to that. That's really, really difficult for you to even say a word or share your message or put a post up or put an article up. I know a kind of mine who takes about, you know, 20, 50 time that they have to beat that 50 times before even posted.

I think like the authority within, for me, it's just, I know what I own this, the price I've got this I'm to kind of moving forward with. I'm on the outside of authorities, obviously having the endorsements right from trusted organizations where that is false and DCS CPS for whatever it is. It's kind of half that.

And Dorsman from a trust that globally organization that is have been proven to be influential, having that backing you up. It is like a marriage. You have to have both, otherwise it wouldn't work. I've seen people who have those potentials. I haven't got it within them. So they hide, they hide.

Zach Arend: Yeah. You're making me think this was just the other week, Mahalia, California, and I had the opportunity to sit on a panel and on that panel was Maya Camarota. I don't know if you know Maya she's going through. She's been in the mastermind. We're in, and she's, she's a powerful transformational coach. She's shared stages with Tony Robbins and.

She was sharing some of her story. And she said something that was powerful. Like I, I made a mental note. I'm like, that is so important. And she said that before people choose you, you have to choose yourself. You have to choose you before anybody else is going to choose you. So what you're talking about, right?

That authority, you have to. Own your authority before anybody else sees your authority, you have to own your abilities to be a leader, to be a great leader, to have influence before you are going before. Other people are going to see that and respond to that. And it's an inside out game. And I, that's why I think why I love how we set the intention for our call today.

Like that is all about reconnecting with our truth, our, our inner greatness, that thing inside of a. Knows exactly who we are and it doesn't need to be questioned and we can show up fully. And that's what I love about who you are. I mean, that's what for, from as I see you just acknowledge, that's what I see in you.

That that's what you represent everything about your story and how you show up and then how you help people is all about that. Finding that inner, that inner greatness and, and fully owning it. So.

Izdihar Jamil: Yes.

Zach Arend: I want to, I want to kind of change gears a little, a little bit. Cause we were talking about before the hit record, we both have kids, children, you have two,

Izdihar Jamil: Yes.

Zach Arend: Two and I have three, three that's right.

Three and I have three. So I have three daughters. You have daughters and sons, right.

Izdihar Jamil: Two boys. Yes. Two boys and a girl.

Zach Arend: And we were talking about. Books, you helped your daughter. If I, if I remember correctly publish a book called the girl who loves ponies

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah.

Zach Arend: and it made me think of my daughter, Claire, she's going to have a powerful story. She's diagnosed dyslexia. Struggles with reading. And we got her a reading tutor about a year ago, and I watched her fall in love with reading and it's like, it moves me.

Like I'm getting, I'm feeling a little bit of tears come to my eyes right now because I know how much reading has changed my life and, and going deep into those that creative world. And, and to watch her now. She will read a book in her room for at least an 45 minutes to an hour before bed, every night on her own.

And so it's like, as a dad, you're like, yes, we did the right thing. We didn't just say, well, she's just not going to be somebody who reads and, and she's found her own way. That's what dyslexia is just finding your own way to read and to consume and learn.

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah.

Zach Arend: And that story she wanted. Really wants a cat mom.

And I say, no cat, we're not getting a cat. You know, for all the reasons you would imagine why we don't want a cat. Well, she wrote a story and she brought it to me. It's handwritten. And the title of the story was, Sam wants a cat

Izdihar Jamil: Oh, so cute.

Zach Arend: it's, it's this story of Sam one and the cat, mom and dad saying, no, you see the symbolism here.

And Sam is going on a walk. He sees this cat stranded in the tree and I've taught her. A great story has to have danger. And she has this story. Sam's climbing the trees, never climbed a tree before a branch breaks and Sam falls the same gets back up and he tries again and he falls and he tries again and he falls.

Eventually he gets the cat and you know, he saves the cat and he, he now brings the cat home and mom and dad can't say no anymore, you know, and Sam, pat, so there's this little short story. It's so good. You know, maybe it's because I'm biased, I'm her dad. Right. But I'm like, we need to. And she loves to draw.

I'm like, let's, let's find a way to make a, children's like, let's write your own book. And then when I heard about what you did, I'm like, you're already way ahead of me. Like the girl who loves ponies. I want to hear from you, what's your story on how that book came about? Cause that's a story your daughter wrote and naturally with, with help from her mama.

But what, what was that like? How did you go about that? Where was that idea even burst. And then how did it come to like publications?

Izdihar Jamil: Oh, my God, this was. Two years ago that we, she wrote a book. I wrote her book on it is that she wants the pony, she loves pony. She wants to pony. And now we're backyard. Right? So I'm like, okay darling, you, you want a pony? No problem. You just gotta figure out how to make. It's pulling, these are expensive, right?

So one of the things I want to teach her is that if it happens for you rather than saying you can't afford it, no, I wants to figure out ways that you can make it happen. And one of the things I want to teach my kids at a young age is a money-making skills. Yes. I think that's so important about making money, money, investing in money.

So she fell on and then she figured it out and all the way she sees me liking books. Right. And becoming a selling author, making money from it. And then she was like, okay. And naturally the type that will be the goal who loves phones, just like class children are so straightforward. Right. They're like, this is what I want.

This is the title. And then she crafted the story. She was six bags. So I wrote down, I wrote it down, we figured it out. And then just really simple storyline that a six year old has coming up with and just like, she loves to draw. So she will be trawling. This thing. Into her book so that people could see her drawings for journey.

I'm not, it's all. I feel that one of the things that I do, one of my biggest accomplishment, my proudest moment is trailblazing a path for my loved one and the people around me. So not drunk. Doesn't have to think about editing, publishing, you know, formatting, your head, doing the bestseller campaign. We put everything together and she's like, mom, I want to be a number one bestselling author, and then I'm licensed cat and then mommy, I want to beat international.

So I'm like, okay, no pressure. Right? Exact like your daughter, wasn't the speaker do that. But it is the post of her getting excited and joining it quick in the storyline. If you see my daughter, she hasn't got that blog. Or challenges. She just writes the rest. She doesn't care about it. No, one's going to take care of it and that profess mommy, but I've seen this block happening in adults.

So my clients, one of my, the book, what story? I don't know if it's good enough. It says I don't people going, gonna like

and then they end up not showing those stories. So if you just trust the process and just share, just like not, I dropped. I want to, I'm going to me just like put it out and let the experts or the professionals take care of it because there's a reason why you hire us in the first place. Right. You just do this one thing so bad and that's how it kind of fishes.

And then not Johanna. I were like telling my son abroad, come on, you want to write a book to write a book? And with like, no, no, no. I'm abroad. These non-drug getting interviewed on Fox, a Fox 11 news because of the story of six. It was kid writing books to save money for a pony. She got into the different places.

And then just recently abroad with slides on, around write a book too. I was like, I was shocked. Okay. And. I want to buy a computer that I can play my games. I learned from my kids. If you have something big enough to hook that into, you'll find that the heat of the vessel or the, the ways that you can make it happen.

So Abrar now you can be trapped in a snow globe was a writing assignment that he started in school that we've now turned into a book. He wrote the storyline, he chose certain parts of the book to create the graphics and then, you know, put the description on it. It's gotten us. I couldn't draw. I mean, my dinosaur looks like a rock, so problem put like a description on it and I have my team take.

To the design, put it together, having it up on, I collaborative with his teacher, his principal, his friends to quit the book. And as a result site, this is like, this is what moves me. The teacher comes back and say, his friends all ask how the kinship of voice all as how can the life book? And I told the teacher, Mrs.

We going to do this together. Nine students, you and I, and all the kids, we can put it up together and then unfollow to books. So that way they can have a story. It's just like a trickling effect at 20 or so. And I don't know if my plan said what it's going to be, but I know at least I can do something to give the courage, to give the confidence, to trailblaze a path, but this office, the online to know, Hey, I have a dream and all I need to know is figure out what the best people to help me or just do this one thing that sharing my story.

Magic.

Zach Arend: Yeah, And it all began with courage. You take courage, you had to find your own courage, find your own authority and like, kind of, this is all coming together. Right? But by you people follow courage and by you being courageous and getting vulnerable and sharing your story, it gave everybody else around.

You. Your children first, right. Permission to tell their stories. And then it's just it's like this trickle effect, you know, this now I, that I didn't realize that that's where the story kind of went. It is now that the students in his class wants to write a story and wow. And it's always cool to think about where did that all begin?

And usually it's somebody stepping across the line saying I'm going to, I'm going to be responsible for. Inner desire of my heart and I'm going to bring it to life, whether I'm scared or not, I'm doing this thing. And that just gives everybody else permission to do the same. So I, thanks for sharing that.

I love that.

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah, it's just about putting, putting more of your stuff out and putting more of yourself out. And from my book bag, the story that I shed on my, on one of my books, yes, I can, I think was a part of my touch. So it kind of like having that kind of impact part of my tech part of my speaking here, it's just the courage, the authenticity to, to kind of put yourself out that I'm owning it and be unapologetic about an hour retreat with both.

That's. One of the things that I discovered is that just being unapologetic about who I am and not bowed down to people's insecurities, because it's not my. To take care of the insecurities. My job is to shine and be unapologetic about myself.

Zach Arend: Yes. Yes. And somewhere the world has made that very counter that's very counter-cultural I think, I think, and. Been aware that subtly, I might be teaching my girls to be apologetic. It is a parent and I, and I caught my wo

Izdihar Jamil: Hmm.

Zach Arend: like harping on them so much to be a kind person too, to say, you're sorry. And, and, you know, And I, my heart's in the right place, but I think it's, it's, it's a fine line to sending a message of don't don't get your needs met.

Don't don't speak your truth place, small place safe, be a kind nice person. And, and, and in a way, I'm I realized like in my teaching, my girls to hide who they really are, and it's something I'm actually, that's fresh in my mind. It's something my wife and I were talking a lot about is like, how do we rate.

Women that are fierce. Like what I want my girls to be fierce, not kind little nice girls. Like I, they, they will, they will naturally have values that will lead them well, like, but I don't want them just to be nice people and kind people like, I want them to be fierce and run at their dreams and, and be unapologetic for who they are because far too long, I was apologetic for who I was.

And so many people that I know was a PA and that that's. Limiting and it doesn't have to be that way. And in fact, we don't serve ourselves and we don't serve people around us when we're apologizing. I just, I feel strongly about that. I believe in raw radical responsibility, just owning what happened and moving forward, moving into it, making it right if it needs to be made.

Right. But we don't have to apologize. Okay. Well, you got me on A little bit of a tangent there.

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah, we've revolutionizes, right? We've revolutionized this. We just revolutionary a blueprint that we were really strong. The culture that we will raise will revolutionize our blueprint, thinking to trail blazing a path. Just friends, some others night, what you and I are doing a different parenting style at different from what our mom and dad taught us to be.

So absolutely being an upload tactic, put more of yourself out and the best possible, best possible way. And then what I've discovered is that just being unapologetic and shattering through shining my coverage is like, oh, 70 something happens and someone does this and it doesn't matter what people think anymore.

What matters. What am I paying for? What am I fighting for?

Zach Arend: Yeah.

Izdihar Jamil: And who am I serving too? Like, I fight for my daughter, not drug because eight takes falls the way that he jumped in America. It just takes bullets to where they can jump in. And that I fight for her to have a by the future so that she can be proud and courageous of who she is and live in a society that is open and accepting of each other's differences.

And I get to be who I want to be in that. Sometimes I'm kind, sometimes I'm thoughtful. Sometimes I'm straight. Sometimes I'm formidable. Sometimes I'm find-able sometimes I'm coverages. Sometimes whoever I want to be in that space.

Zach Arend: Yeah, one of my. Mentors always told me the best way to, to teach love is to be love. And what I, what the word for you is courageous. And you know, the best, you know, your teeth, the best way to teach courage is to be courageous. And that's what I just thought of when you talked about like, it takes balls to wear where yeah, I, yes.

And you are teaching everyone around you. What courage, the meaning of courage. And you Thank you.

for that because it's not.

Izdihar Jamil: Thank you.

Zach Arend: With that. You've got three kids at home. I've got three kids. They're at school right now, but we also have a puppy. Well, it's not a puppy anymore. She's a year and a half old. It's a black mini Bernie doodle, Zoe.

And she's downstairs right now. I don't know what she's doing. I have my door closed. He's whining and nipping. And, and it's like, oh, can you quiet down? Do you not know him on a podcast? Kids you you're working. You're at home. You have kids. So how do you do this? How do you stay focused on your dream? Cause there's no question.

You have a dream and you have a desire to have huge impact in your life. All the while there is life happening all around us kids. the dog downstairs, you know, life and just responsibilities of being a partner and a spouse and a mom and dad, and you know, all the things. But then I have this dream, which often can feel all consuming.

Some of us kind of have this obsessive for, I do like, and my wife does too. We like, we're very dialed into what we're building and creating. And then balancing all the other things that matter in our lives too, and not letting that get too lopsided, staying in harmony.

Izdihar Jamil: Hmm.

Zach Arend: What, what advice do you have for us?

Those very ambitious, driven, dream oriented individuals, entrepreneurial people that also are managing life. You know, what, how do you do it? I'll just start there. How do you do it?

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah.

Zach Arend: Yeah.

Izdihar Jamil: Oh my God. I think like managing, balancing things. I don't think I'll ever have that balance. I don't think I'll ever have that moment. I have a son. Oh, that's like, everything is good, but I feel like one of the key thing that I've learned about myself, that it's okay to mess up. It's okay to drop the balls.

I know it sounds like, kind of like, no, you gotta have. No the other day I cooked. Right. And then I was on a call on a foot, but something was on the stove. So he got burned. He got burnt. Right. And then there wasn't enough time for me to make another dinner. I just served. And then my husband reads, I was like, oh, did you try a new recipe, babe?

I tried a new recipe

to feel like if I can be hard on myself, like I'm not myself. The opposite of what I mean, CEO should do. We should be kind and compassionate to yourself because it working so hard. I kind of like putting things in place, especially at home, having my family and my children helped me out a little bit, because the last thing I want to do is between it not the last thing that I wanted to do.

So my kids every day, one of the chores is that they have to clean up the fish for. And then, so my son abroad would clean up the top shelf now clean up the bottom one, whatever that heat that's pulled off. And then the kids would every night, that would one, one kid would wipe that dining table on the one would Hooper or vacuum clean up under the dining table.

So that's one thing less for me. And then my husband would take care of. I don't like doing dishes. Like I cook, I just don't like doing dishes. And then there are days when all my thoughts, this call, can you come and pick up your daughter? We finished school at one o'clock today. And it's like two I'm like, oh my God.

Like that goes to my mommy of the year award. My kids get mad at me, but I have my. It's okay. This is part of it. This is part of the high cage off me going up and basis. It always is an easy and I've started to let go. A lot of things that are good girl should behave. Why mom should do not drop what come home and she's hungry.

She would cook herself. She wouldn't make eggs or toast. And she's only eight. So, um, do you know what I mean? I've kind of let go of that good girl behavior, because that goes with behavior is going get me killed at some point in life. Either overworked, either overstressed, three kids with a baby. It is not easy.

And even in rehab now, whenever I go on calls, I'll just take him with me. If it's not. So he wouldn't be here, you know, and then just let go. A lot of perfections that

Zach Arend: Yeah.

Izdihar Jamil: like, as a business woman, I feel I shouldn't do this. I shouldn't have no kids. I'm like, this is my reality. Now I've got a baby. I do not want my kids.

That's my personal choice. I don't want to send Ray Han to. 'cause, you know, he probably is my last time and I want to spend every moment with him. So he comes with me. He even has a t-shirt in the making. He comes with me on my sales

to convert when they highest with me. It's just not. And warm that reality of that ability. And then in terms of the business, I have to have a PA that that helps take up certain things. I have team members, I put in strategies that is in alignment with me. For example, I don't want to do any more sales calls in my business.

So I took that one out. Whereas all of the industry saying, you need to have a field Scott. I'm like, I don't want. I don't want to do that. And I put something else in so that I can put my energy on serving my clients. So I don't do any more sales fault. I don't. The only time people get speak to me is when they become my client or the pate and invested amounts, speak with me.

So it's just different, different facets.

Zach Arend: Yeah. Well, we had on a previous episode, I got to talk to Wendy Anderson. I think you might know Wendy. I'm not sure, but she has special needs children and she's also an entrepreneur and she talked a lot about redefining normal and kind of the takeaway of that episode and what I hear you, you're saying it again.

You have to do what serves you and your dream and everybody in, in and around you, it's got to work for you and. Always team like I'm here. You have a team at home. You have a team in your business far too often. I think we fall into this trap of trying to carry it all on our back. And you said it So, well, like if I keep doing that, it's going to kill me.

And when you said that, I I'll be honest. I was like, well, that's, that's kind of strong, but then. No. What, what does happen is we, we kill our dream. We start saying this, this dream just is impossible for me. There's no way I can live up to the standards of the world and what it's supposed to, what a good mom's supposed to be.

And, you know, do all the things perfect all the while, still pursue my dream. You can't. And so what we do is we kill the dream and a part of us does die. I believe a part of us when we start to quit on ourselves. It's kind of, uh, it's, it's sad and thank you for role modeling the way, because it's not easy, right?

It's not easy. It takes immense courage and immense intentionality because life will have its way with all of us. If we let it, we have to choose to show up and be powerful and, and, and listen to our own inner authority. And so thank you for being that role model for all of us. And as we wrap up. I want to just ask some quick hit questions.

One quick question is I like to read, so it's a selfish question I like to learn from others. So is there a book or a podcast or a person that's inspiring you right now? And what about that person is drawing you in right now?

Izdihar Jamil: So, so that's two books. So I listened to. I'm driving and cooking and everything. So the first one is unstoppable by TMX Grover, who is a Michael Jordan's trained, man. He's talked about what it, what, who, what does it look like to be unstoppable, to be the best like Michael Jordan was the best of the best at this time?

I don't think anyone else has come close to his track record. What the think, what they feel, how they're able to shut down everything else and just go for, for, for the trains for, for the kill they call it. And then the other one, the other book is called. Parents hurt me my debit card. Oh, my God, my book capillary has increased being so colorful, but reading that book, every other line felt like, oh my God, I didn't know.

I knew we would driving with my husband and the kids and then I put it on and then that'd be up in line with. Why was that never heard before? And my husband was like, what are some like, okay, so now I just listen to it with, with me. And it's all about this mental toughness tepid. Croghan was. So, you know, a seals at the one that's just to a cleaner, like a set that just beyond physicality, that mental toughness, that mental toughness Smith's like, what is it when things happen around you?

So those are the two books. It changed this all the time. It was five languages of love before that it was packing money by 1,000 up before that it changes all the time, all the times that those.

Zach Arend: Well, I was not expecting you to name those two books, Tim Grover one of the toughest, like all about winning in life, coach, some of the best athletes in the world, his book, relentless, I think is the one you're referring to. And. And then David Goggins, probably two of the most intense people on planet earth. You're reading their books and it's, you're so unassuming, right? Like you're I just got an ICU. I see you as The, silent assassin, like that coup cleaner that Tim Grover like, oh, that's really? Who is he is. Wow. Anyway, loved it. I did not expect those two books to be named, but, and I have not read can't hurt me.

I've I've heard David Goggins speak and I'm like, dang that guy. There's nobody more intense than that, man. And yeah.

Izdihar Jamil: The, I mean, you probably were expecting him leading this romance or

Zach Arend: Yeah. Or yeah, some Pema Chodron or you know, something that's very, you know, spiritual and, and calming and centering. And, and there's something. about those books. I think on the surface we read like, oh yeah, hard work, discipline, grit grind, just to sacrifice yourself for the dream and winning, winning is everything. I think it's the lens in which we read those books. Because if I were to read those same books, five, 10 years ago, it would have caused me to work myself into the ground, just drive myself to absolute exhaustion, to where I wanted to quit and I would often quit. But now I read those books through a lens of. It's more of the spirit of which you commit to something that's important to you and you give everything, you got to it. I don't know. It has a different energy for me when I read those books now. And so I would encourage people not to write off personalities that are maybe different than how you think.

And apply your lens through what they're saying and grab the law. There's so much to glean from Tim, Tim Grover. Even if you have no, nothing about athletics, which, or sports there's so much there that apply to a creative.

Izdihar Jamil: Yeah, 15 months at the end of the chapter, he talks about his daughter. The lovely task for his daughter and the drive. So you were in at that point lens that you're saying, right. If you look at it, he talks it because of the love that he has for his daughter. Right. And then can hurt me, David Crockett.

It's like, I don't want you to look at me as a hero. I want you to be your own hero. So it's kind of like, it's the, again, what we talked about that the teeth, the own, this you're the prize. So I think that is. That's such a beautiful thing to kind of like see it from your own lens.

Zach Arend: Yes. Well, let's, let's wrap up and I want to just ask you where. And people find you learn more engaged with you and your.

Izdihar Jamil: So people can find me on my website is dot com is the hotelier. I'll find me on social media. I am D R is behind I M D . And if I made that, I think we started off with intention. If I may just a few seconds, I would love to kind of like competed with an intention with an intention that I did just before I won on the test.

So before I went on the Ted talk, I know when, when they MCs to 95th says when next speaker is, that is the hard time. And then in that moment, I just close my eyes and I say, God, just let me be that. Come here, my heart, let me touch their hearts. Help me to take care of one person. And I will be so grateful and still it is.

And so it is done.

Zach Arend: Thank you. Hopefully you really enjoyed this podcast episode and my hope is you. Really inspirational. And also most importantly, I hope you took away some practical things that you can start to do and apply in your own life. So finally, I have one small favor to ask of you before you go, wherever you get your podcasts, whether that's apple music or Spotify.

If you enjoyed this episode, leave us a review. Love to hear your thoughts. Come find us on social media, share it on social media. It just really helps us get the word out, helps us grow our audience. So please do that. Thanks to my team, Ashley Bolden, who handles all the admin and Chris Skipper who handles all the music and editing of this podcast for more information.

Great purpose podcast. You can go to www.createpurpose.net, and you can also follow me on Instagram at @zach.arend. Please drop me a comment, reach out, drop me a DM. I'd love to hear from you and love to hear what you're taking away from these conversations. What would you like to hear more of? Do you have any guests that you would love to see?

Come on the show. And I'm always looking for great people to talk to people with great stories that can inspire you. And so if you know of anybody, send them my way, love to hear from. I'm your host, Zach Aaron, and I'll see you in the next episode of the Create Purpose Podcast. Bye for now.